Flow State on Demand: What Time Distortion Does to Performance

So when you mirror me, what also happens is you also pick up my state of mind. Okay, so see, time distortion is the phenomenon where something happened appears to go slower than it actually is, or something happens to go faster than it actually is. Like in a martial artist, when they're sparing, they, it, when someone is about to punch them, for them it feels like there's a lot of time in between the punch. Like a professional cricketer, when they're waiting for the ball to come. For you and me, it might appear to come like this, but for them it appears to come a little slower than it actually, it feels to people around. Some people might have a near-death experience during an accident, you know, like, like there's an accident about to take place, and suddenly you feel like as if the entire world has stopped. Some people can do that on demand, like I was a bike racer once, so I would go on these races and it would be like as if every other vehicle has literally stopped. It doesn't mean they have stopped, it's just that you're processing things faster. Now when you mirror somebody, you also pick up their state of mind. So if I'm in a time-distorted state when you mirror me, you also get into a time-distorted state. Does it make sense? So now let's say you want to become a cricketer. Then in addition to getting the skills of batting and bowling, you also, and the posture and the techniques, you also want the skill where the ball is appearing to come slower at you than it appears to other people. So a lot of the performance game is internal. Like, the state of mind determines how well you perform. Now a surgeon has a very different altered state of mind than a cricketer would, or, you know, when snipers go on the field. By the way, sniping is not as simple as there's a target and you get the angle right and fire. Because when you're sniping, you're actually compensating for the humidity, the wind speed. At the end of the day, it's a projectile that's very lightweight and there will be variations at where it's going to land. But a sniper has to compensate for all of that intuitively at that moment where he or she's pulling the trigger. So most snipers, what happens is they go into a meditative state. In fact, a lot of sniper training, even in the military, they teach meditation before sniping, before teaching them to use a sniper. Because what happens for most people is they get into an altered state where the target appears much closer than it actually is. And when they're aiming, they're just calculating something nearby, but automatically that's translating to the real distance. The calculations are automatically getting translated to the real distance. Now imagine if someone tries to learn the art of using a sniper rifle, but never gets this altered state. For most people, getting these altered states takes decades. If you're a martial artist, you train for 10 years, maybe you will learn time distortion. But then I think the other way to learn is you get the state first by mirroring, and then learning the other components becomes much more easier. So this is why mirroring is not only about influencing people, but mirroring is also about accelerated learning. It actually allows you to pick up the states in which you can do things which otherwise would be impossible to do. When I first went to learn NLP from Richard Bandler, there were about 300 people in the room, and I used to obsessively and compulsively practice everything he was asking me to do. And one day, you had to come one hour early if you had to get the first throw. So I one day go really early, and I sit in the first seat. I was, I think, a kid then. I was like 23 or something, 22. And all I was thinking of, I've taken all my savings. You know, it was, I don't know, I think it costed me like eight or nine lakhs for the travel stay. It was in London, and I just recently bought a house. Whatever I had, I had to put it on that program. And it was not even my career. I'd just come there for time pass, right, because I'm a technology guy. And I'm like, okay, I've invested all of this in here. This Bandler is just, you know, he's telling these stories, and I'm learning something, but let me get the most of it. So I'm going to, and the other fear was after 60s, he's going to be gone. So I was like, let me get the most from Bandler. And I'm sitting in the front, and I'm like, and I developed this headache. God, it was terrible. So it was break, and then I go, and there's a long line to talk to Bandler, and I stand there, and finally it's my turn to ask him a question. So I say, Bandler, I have a headache. I've just been trying to mirror you. So there was an empty chair. Bandler said, sit down here. I sat. I thought he was going to work on me, and I was very excited. He ignored, and he started talking to the person in front. And as he was talking, he started speaking about a story of his trip to India. And he said about how once when he came to India, he met this, a guru who was able to go into a very nice, powerful, altered state. And he told the guru, teach me how you do this. And the guru said, no, no, it's going to take you 10 years of discipline, and you have to be my disciple before you can learn to do this. And Bandler said, OK, can you just go in there and show me once? And Bandler said that as soon as the guru went into that altered state, Bandler started to breathe exactly the same way the guru was breathing at that point in time. And he said, as he started to do that, in an instant, he felt his consciousness changing. And he was aware of a lot of things, and he went into a powerful state of mind himself. The interesting thing is when Bandler was telling the story to the person he was talking to, I started to feel a sense of comfort in my body. My head began to relax, and I started to feel less pain. And I started to breathe in differently. And in a moment, it appeared as if I could see everybody in the room at the same time. The sounds of people speaking from far were more louder and distinctive and clearer. And at the same time, I was totally relaxed. It was as if in this moment, I'm totally alert and relaxed at the same time. And as I was enjoying this experience, Bandler turns, looks at me, and he says, this is how you learn everything that is going on here by starting from a very resourceful state. Ever since I've been a kineser of states, every time I see someone do something extraordinary, I would mirror them and collect their state. And I would like, OK, this is a nice addition.